Okay, so let’s talk. My last blog post was very number-oriented. I realized this as I was writing it, and while it was all true, it’s also important for me to point out that the numbers aren’t everything. They’re fun to toss around and hypothesize about and sometimes they feel really important, but it’s also important to make sure I’m learning instead of just absorbing information and then spitting it back out for a reward. And if I’m not learning anything, then I should at least be having some thoughts about college or education or life in general.
It’s the end of the semester and grades are all the hype right about now. The most important thing is how well everyone’s doing in all their classes.
It was easy for me to get caught up in the numbers game when I finished off my first semester perfectly and I want to be able to maintain that, because the only direction I can go from here is down. I want to be able to achieve perfection in general, not just because of the standard I set for myself last semester.
And, being surrounded by so many smart people, I feel like I have something to prove. I’m not used to having to prove myself that much. I went through elementary, middle, and high school with people who knew what I was and wasn’t capable of. Now that I’m surrounded by new people who don’t know or aren’t familiar with my standards, there’s more pressure to make sure I stick to them. Especially living in Honors housing, being surrounded by people who are the smartest of our freshman class. Especially when I compare myself to those who earned the scholarship that I wanted so badly, but didn’t get.
I’m not saying these are the best reasons, but that they are reasons. There are reasons I get caught up in chasing a number. But there are also reasons I shouldn’t, and it’s good to stay balanced.
I love you all!
And… I’ll be home within the week!