I don’t know if it’s the way the weather has been so gorgeously warm and sunny, or if it’s knowing that we’re coming down the home stretch and I’ll be home in a week, or if it’s that my relationships with the people around me have all been reaching high points, or if it’s the college, but I’ve been wearing rose-colored glasses this week. I have moments were I’m just walking through the spine and suddenly everything feels perfectly okay and I have to smile and soak up the goodness of the moment. It was a good week as weeks go, despite being a busy one.
One of the coolest parts about this week was Ash Wednesday. On such a large, bustling, city-like campus like UB’s, it gets easy to brush past all the people you pass in the halls and on the streets every day. You get used to ignoring the ones you don’t know and everyone becomes an expert at avoiding eye contact, especially when they’re the only two people crossing paths in a long stretch of hallway. But on Tuesday night at CA, we talked about having the right attitude about all the people around us (for example, smiling at those people that you’d normally ignore, or saying hello to the ones you bump into and then grumble about). And then when I got my ashes Wednesday afternoon, I felt like they held me accountable for the rest of the day. See, one of the things that makes it easy to ignore all the other people is that they’re just ignoring you back. They won’t remember you if you bump into them because you’re in a rush, or you awkwardly look away when you make eye contact. But when you’re among only a few hundred students and faculty who have black smudges across their foreheads (on a campus of 30 thousand), you stand out. Everyone knows what it means, and they’re paying attention to see if you’ll live up to the standards that you literally have written across your face.
That has gotten me thinking about the type of person I am on a normal basis and that’s getting uncomfortably convicting. I’ve written before that college is a time when you pretty much just worry about you, and while that’s nice, it puts you into a very me-centered world that can get out of control when you aren’t keeping it in check.
That’s just something I’ve noticed and would like to remain aware of. I think my friends are a good measure for me. It helps that I’m surrounded by good people.
The countdown has reached just over a week now! I love you guys and I’m looking forward to seeing you.